Crushes of the Past and Present

Here is a list of crushes I've had over the years that never seem to go away. Why? Because I'm bored and don't feel like doing minutes for meetings that I hated attending in the first place. Re-listening to a meeting you already had to sit through once should be considered cruel and unusual punishment! Especially when that meeting refers to computer technical mumbo-jumbo that sounds more like a new strain of flu than what software we should update to in order to stay up to industry standards. Le sigh...

Boy Crushes:

Leonardo Dicaprio. At the age of 12 this was the pinnacle. I had his picture everywhere, and wrote his name on every notebook I could get my hands on. I collected every Teen Beat, People and Sixteen that dared to mention his name. It was unhealthy, but it was my life.

Adrien Brody. This man is beautiful, I don't care what you say.

Kurt Cobain. Ever since I was little. This will never change.

Jason Segel, Seth Rogen, Paul Rudd. Just take out Jonah Hill. I've never seen a single movie or tv show that any on these guys have been involved with and not loved it. I'd be so down for any of them, which is huge because even though I have crushes on dudes, I'd never do any of them becaues penises are foreign and gross to me; so much so that I had to spell check "penises" because I wasn't sure how to spell it .

Girl Crushes:

Kate Moennig. For real, this is the biggest crush I have ever had except for Leo when I was 12. I legit just spent 20 minutes looking at pictures of her on Google because I could. She's my freebie, where by some miracle I was to ever come across her in real life and have a chance to sleep with her I could without fault. Haley and I agreed. Just like she can sleep with Lily Loveless.

Audrey Hepburn. The first crush I ever had on a girl was for this woman.

Lizzy Caplan. I don't know a single person IRL that would not agree. I dare say if you don't, than you're not someone I'd get along with.

Keira Knightley. But only from Domino, because she still ate back then.

Zooey Deschanel.